Why Can't Life Be Easy?

Because then it would not be called "Life". It would be called "Easy". God I'm philosophical...

***CAUTION*** THE FOLLOWING PARAGRAPH CONTAINS SOME DEEP SHIT!! READ WITH DISCRETION. Hehe

I have been doing a lot of thinking over the last few days since getting back from San Diego. Thinking about where I am at right now, relationships(or lack there of), friendships and work related stuff. And I have come to the conclusion that without a little struggle in life I would have completely lost interest by now. I get frustrated with myself and others sometimes because I am not certain of what is going on. I like to know what people think (both about me, and in general), and I like to know intentions. I have always been a decent judge on character/intent, and I think that is one of the reasons that I still have 4 close friends from the age of 6, Ryan Arant, Alan Brimer, Aimee Davignon and James Barlow. I am right now though at a loss. I feel like I have become a bit disconnected from those around me and those that I think I really care about or have the potential to really care about. I am happy to have made some new friends recently, but am not able to read intent. This is something that only time can solve. It is also something that makes me a big friggin' "Worry Wort." Its one of those situations where I just need to keep playing the game of life, and see where my path takes me. I have come to the realization that in the game of "Life", no matter how hard it is, and how alone and somber you feel, you never really lose the game until you quit playing.

In other news, Marlene Okner, yes you Marlene, has left us at work for greener pastures and ridiculous schedules! I work 15 of the next 16 days and my only day off is a crappy Monday. I am taking Sundays off starting on the 18th and am going to enjoy every bit of them. It will be nice to have a lazy day off when all my amigos are off too. The one problem with being in the service/hospitality industry is that your schedule is usually pretty effed-up as Marsa says.

My Chargers are playing tomorrow at 1:00PM. I work at 2:00.. :-| Really? They are playing the Pittsburgh Steelers in Pittsburgh and are NOT at all favorites based on Vegas odds. We'll see how that goes. God knows I'll have ESPN Gamecast up at work watching every play! I hope its not busy on Sunday, because I'm not doing a DAMN THING!

I went out last night with Alex and Joel to the Abbey and met up with Phil, Frang, the Jeffs, Mark, Dindo and a couple others. It was a good time. I kinda sat back and listened to the conversations around me, trying to drink it all in.

Frangelo's man proposed to him on Xmas Day up in the Bay and bought him a really nice ring. I don't know them very well at all, but I am really happy to see the gays standing up to this proposition 8 BS. My advice, go to San Francisco, and let Mayor(Future Governor?) Newsome marry you to spite the 52% of this hateful state.

A couple of Dindo's amigos were drunk and bashing each other and one of them used a racial epithet for a person of Arab origin that also contains a racial slur for a black person...You figure it out...Normally people say whatever and I don't really get that offended. This time was no different, but I still thought about it all the way home. I thought about it long enough that I had a dream last night. I for some reason remember this dream VERY VIVIDLY!

I was at dinner with the cast of Family Matters, Yes, Family Matters, Carl, Harriet, Eddie, Laura, Judy(Who is now an adult filmstar), Richie, Aunt Rachel, Grandma Estelle, Urkel, Waldo and even Urkel's gf Myra...Don't ask. Anyways, every time I opened my mouth a racial slur came out. Finally, Harriet asked me to leave dinner because I was making everyone upset. I woke up with tears in my eyes...WTF is wrong with me? haha

I think that's it, for now at least. I have not had any more run-ins with older Jewish woman which, of course, is a good thing. Today is Saturday though and they are all out walking like zombies. I need to be careful...